Being the village
It never ceases to amaze me how much can change in a short period of time, and how you can land in a place you never expected. 3 years ago I was a parent of 3 children and one on the way. Our schedule was backwards to the rest of the world around us, our time together was during the week. This left me on my own with the kids on the weekends. My spouse worked weekends and only attended church on wednesday nights and occasional sunday nights. I took the children to church on my own. We had joined this church a year prior and I am pretty sure there were folks in the church who had no idea I was married and assumed I was a single parent. I say all of this to bring light to something I wrote during that time. Believe it or not, I don't write often. I am a conversationalist by nature. I did write something that I felt needed to be said. Lately it's been on my mind again.
"To all who serve in children’s ministry:
We always talk about the importance of children’s ministries for teaching our children God’s love and eventually leading them to know Christ on a personal level. That is so important, raising our children to know, love and walk with Christ is the best thing we can do for them. However, you do so much more than you know.
That child that sits and listens intently to your story, may have been struggling to listen to their parents this last week.
The one and half year old that screams when mom walks out, might have been afraid to leave mom for 2 days.
Perhaps the child enjoying a craft has been finding everything in the house they shouldn’t be in all weekend.
You’re teaching them. You’re telling them a story of God’s love and teaching them to sit and listen politely. You’re comforting a toddler that doesn’t yet understand mom will return and they are safe and loved. You’re giving them the freedom to create and use their imaginations while they learn.
And yet it’s so much more than that even. You’re giving the worn out, run down, exhausted and sometimes exasperated parents a chance too. They get to sit and listen to someone teaching them, rather than being the teacher. They get to be filled and served for a change. They get a break.
You know you’re a part of helping those children grow, but you’re also giving the parents what they need to continue helping their children grow. You’re giving them a chance to grow and regroup themselves. That’s huge!
So whether you do children’s church, teach a sunday school class, or snuggle babies in the nursery; When that mom or dad picks up their child and quietly says thank you, there’s so much more behind it than you probably realize. So Truly, Thank you!
Not all your days are filled with quiet, happy, kind or listening children. Those days are even more important for you to realize the depth of your impact, not just on the child, but their whole family.
So truly thank you for everything you do, you don’t always realize how much it truly amounts to."
That letter was written by a warn out parent who's real need was for some time to themselves. Some time to not be wiping anything, holding anyone, or be responsible for anyone besides them self. Someone needing to rest in God for just a few hours. That was not an individual looking to be a part of any ministry involving children. The need was to have a safe place while their children were poured into by others. There are so many of those in our churches and serving our children is serving those families in a very unique way.
Flash forward 3 years. My place is with the kids now. Don't get me wrong. I still long to have an adult sunday school class and to have more weeks listening to a sermon than teaching. However, I am blessed to be in a place to serve our kids and our families. I love having a conversation with a 3rd grader on why his dad is frustrated with the choices he has made today and walking him down the hall to apologize. I love hanging out with a rowdy room of 1st grade boys who pretend to shoot me because I am wearing reindeer antlers. I love pointing out the differences in the gospel accounts to a group of 5th and 6th graders and listening to them snicker when they realize someone ran away naked when Jesus was betrayed. I enjoy hanging out with the 2nd grade girls and helping them find ways to be kind to one another. I appreciate the realism when we try to find practical ways to serve our families and the thought of helping with laundry is in reality not going to happen this week for one young lady. Drawing faces on rocks with preschoolers, but talking about praising God so they don't have to cry out. Eating pretend food with toddlers. By far my favorite part though is just loving on these kids. Some days that is silly. Some days it's deep. I can truly say I enjoy finding the differences in every one of the kids I have been blessed to be around in our children's department. Each has a different thing that makes them feel special. Silly faces, sharing snacks, air tickles, pretend head locks, inside jokes, big hugs and so many more things. These kids brighten my days. All of these things come down to showing them something very important. God loves them very much and made them unique for a very important reason. I struggled for years with not fitting in, until I realized I am not supposed to. I fit out; and that is just the way God made me. Maybe that is so I can use my crazy uniqueness to help these kids feel more comfortable in their own skin, with who they are. Maybe it's more than that. I don't fully know, I'm still figuring it out. But I do know this, God has called me to these kids.
It's not just about them though. I am a parent. I know, in the deepest parts of me, what it's like. On the best of days and the worst. I know what it's like to scream at your children out of anger and completely regret it the second it left your mouth. I know what it's like to be so overwhelmed by the cacophony around you that you just can't function.I understand how unique and amazing each one of them is, even when it's hard to see it past their chaos. Something I have found to be true for me in the last few months is I take great joy in being able to be a part of other families villages. Once I stepped into our children's ministry with my whole heart I found that I was exactly where God wanted me. It's not perfect, and frankly neither am I, but it is where God has me and wants to use me.
I am still and will always be very grateful for all who serve in children's ministry. To stand with a family and be a living example of what Christ has called us to in our lives is so incredibly important. To be real, to love, to ask forgiveness, to cry with, to pray for each other including the youngest amongst us is a great privileged and a huge responsibility. It amazes me to realize how far God has brought me in so few years and to realize the magnitude of what he has called me to be a part of. I am humbled by the weight of it and yet so thankful.
"To all who serve in children’s ministry:
We always talk about the importance of children’s ministries for teaching our children God’s love and eventually leading them to know Christ on a personal level. That is so important, raising our children to know, love and walk with Christ is the best thing we can do for them. However, you do so much more than you know.
That child that sits and listens intently to your story, may have been struggling to listen to their parents this last week.
The one and half year old that screams when mom walks out, might have been afraid to leave mom for 2 days.
Perhaps the child enjoying a craft has been finding everything in the house they shouldn’t be in all weekend.
You’re teaching them. You’re telling them a story of God’s love and teaching them to sit and listen politely. You’re comforting a toddler that doesn’t yet understand mom will return and they are safe and loved. You’re giving them the freedom to create and use their imaginations while they learn.
And yet it’s so much more than that even. You’re giving the worn out, run down, exhausted and sometimes exasperated parents a chance too. They get to sit and listen to someone teaching them, rather than being the teacher. They get to be filled and served for a change. They get a break.
You know you’re a part of helping those children grow, but you’re also giving the parents what they need to continue helping their children grow. You’re giving them a chance to grow and regroup themselves. That’s huge!
So whether you do children’s church, teach a sunday school class, or snuggle babies in the nursery; When that mom or dad picks up their child and quietly says thank you, there’s so much more behind it than you probably realize. So Truly, Thank you!
Not all your days are filled with quiet, happy, kind or listening children. Those days are even more important for you to realize the depth of your impact, not just on the child, but their whole family.
So truly thank you for everything you do, you don’t always realize how much it truly amounts to."
That letter was written by a warn out parent who's real need was for some time to themselves. Some time to not be wiping anything, holding anyone, or be responsible for anyone besides them self. Someone needing to rest in God for just a few hours. That was not an individual looking to be a part of any ministry involving children. The need was to have a safe place while their children were poured into by others. There are so many of those in our churches and serving our children is serving those families in a very unique way.
Flash forward 3 years. My place is with the kids now. Don't get me wrong. I still long to have an adult sunday school class and to have more weeks listening to a sermon than teaching. However, I am blessed to be in a place to serve our kids and our families. I love having a conversation with a 3rd grader on why his dad is frustrated with the choices he has made today and walking him down the hall to apologize. I love hanging out with a rowdy room of 1st grade boys who pretend to shoot me because I am wearing reindeer antlers. I love pointing out the differences in the gospel accounts to a group of 5th and 6th graders and listening to them snicker when they realize someone ran away naked when Jesus was betrayed. I enjoy hanging out with the 2nd grade girls and helping them find ways to be kind to one another. I appreciate the realism when we try to find practical ways to serve our families and the thought of helping with laundry is in reality not going to happen this week for one young lady. Drawing faces on rocks with preschoolers, but talking about praising God so they don't have to cry out. Eating pretend food with toddlers. By far my favorite part though is just loving on these kids. Some days that is silly. Some days it's deep. I can truly say I enjoy finding the differences in every one of the kids I have been blessed to be around in our children's department. Each has a different thing that makes them feel special. Silly faces, sharing snacks, air tickles, pretend head locks, inside jokes, big hugs and so many more things. These kids brighten my days. All of these things come down to showing them something very important. God loves them very much and made them unique for a very important reason. I struggled for years with not fitting in, until I realized I am not supposed to. I fit out; and that is just the way God made me. Maybe that is so I can use my crazy uniqueness to help these kids feel more comfortable in their own skin, with who they are. Maybe it's more than that. I don't fully know, I'm still figuring it out. But I do know this, God has called me to these kids.
It's not just about them though. I am a parent. I know, in the deepest parts of me, what it's like. On the best of days and the worst. I know what it's like to scream at your children out of anger and completely regret it the second it left your mouth. I know what it's like to be so overwhelmed by the cacophony around you that you just can't function.I understand how unique and amazing each one of them is, even when it's hard to see it past their chaos. Something I have found to be true for me in the last few months is I take great joy in being able to be a part of other families villages. Once I stepped into our children's ministry with my whole heart I found that I was exactly where God wanted me. It's not perfect, and frankly neither am I, but it is where God has me and wants to use me.
I am still and will always be very grateful for all who serve in children's ministry. To stand with a family and be a living example of what Christ has called us to in our lives is so incredibly important. To be real, to love, to ask forgiveness, to cry with, to pray for each other including the youngest amongst us is a great privileged and a huge responsibility. It amazes me to realize how far God has brought me in so few years and to realize the magnitude of what he has called me to be a part of. I am humbled by the weight of it and yet so thankful.
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